Already used a quote as a reference to the book, oops… Couldn’t resist, because I really did fall for this book at the very first page, and more and more the further their journey took me. After the first few pages of slowly getting into this book, I was so into it that I lost all sense of the real world, all aspects of it, all at once…
As I began the journey, the next day I couldn’t stop thinking about it. My mind was completely absorbed by the universe of Hazel Grace. The main character, our heroine of the plot, is probably what struck me at first, and what made me recognise John Green’s crooked yet genius way of making his readers disappear in the ‘Hazel-and-Gus’ utopia. Well done, sir. You had me at the funnily enough non-cliche ‘A boy was staring at me.’ Here’s me thinking it will be one of those teenage high-school stories about a young love with people who connect and have a few things in common and get on well. Oh no, there is much MUCH more to it, besides the cancer thing. Lemme just talk about Hazel Grace before I go on praising the book’s non-cliche plot twists and metaphors etc.
She has cancer. Of course an obvious fact for anyone who has merely heard of the book. Throughout the novel we get to know her perceptions on her illness, on death, afterlife, oblivion and teenage stuff too. What I like about Green’s projection of the character is that she doesn’t come across as a pretentious adult-in-process nor does she resemble a typically moody teenager who intentionally disconnects from her parents as a metaphorical protest against the non-empathetic world. She has a great relationship with her mother and her over-sensitive dad. She reads a lot, watches TV and actively uses social networks resembling the teenager-template stereotypically appropriate for her age. Yet her ‘aura of sophistication’ – as Gus calls it – overshadows the whole teenage image. To begin with, she is struggling to come to terms with dying and assumes that ‘almost’ everything is a side effect of our conclusive and inevitable end on this planet. Those however, begin to change moderately with Augustus’ arrival, which is fairly early on in the book, in the first chapter to be precise. I mean she’s a pretty cool kid, and I honestly would not mind hanging out with her on a daily basis, purely to have some banter with the lass. In other words, Mr Green, you have invented a beautifully spirited and admirably gifted girl in her manner of speech and thought, whose one downfall is that omnipresent oxygen tank. I absolutely adore the fact that she can joke and laugh about her disease, whilst at the same time she unambiguously realises cancer’s one true mission.
The Gus and Hazel universe though… I mean, their phone calls, their banter, their jokes, their debates, just their own space upon which they drift bearing in mind that
The world is not a wish-granting factory.
Augustus is an intriguing one… He’s blunt but harmless. Opinionated but fun. He doesn’t appear to take many things seriously, as he says he’s on a ‘roller coaster’ and I guess that’s all we want to believe at times, that life is a fun roller coaster with fun things to do at the theme park, lots of laughter and sweet treats where nothing really has to make sense or have a purpose. But there are queues, financial issues and – well, kinda dark aspect – but death too, even at theme parks… Getting off topic? Slightly, but somewhat making a point along the way (I hope…) So the Hazel-and-Gus theme park was fun, heart-warming and sooooo so emotional but not in a bitter, Romeo and Juliet way. Although I admit, yes their love story did provoke a few tears (maybe more than a few…) but in a somewhat uplifting way as it made me feel hopeful and warm inside. Gus’ metaphor of the cigarette… Extremely clever! Perhaps the metaphor that was quite literal in its purpose, was the icing on the cake for me when getting to know the character. Awesome dude right there. And of course deadly romantic, I mean ‘It would be a privilege to have my heart broken by you.’?! Ah that Gus, melts my heart, until… Page 215.
Just as Gus announced his unanticipated return of the good old friend cancer, supernaturally sensing my need for comfort, my kitty cat crawled onto my knees and began purring whilst providing me with comfort and security of another heartbeat’s presence. I was heartbroken for that whole evening, night and next morning… My reduced visibility due to more tears pouring into my eyes, forced me to put the book down and caress my cat as I searched for comfort. She must have sensed my need for company – maybe I have a cat with psychic powers? Or at least telepathic…? I welcomed her presence whilst returning my mind to our universe but deserting my heart with Gus and Hazel. So page 215 is the moment the tears began, and there was more to come in the following chapters… Oh John, spare us… (yes I can call the author John because we’re best mates… well at least I feel like we are because I found his writing style admirable and connected with him the way writers sometimes do… And that’s a thing. I feel deeply connected with the author’s writing.)
Glasses removed, tears wiped… And yet I am still in the Gus and Hazel universe; I try to find myself in this present tense of this limited and time-controlled world, but I fail. It wasn’t quite the love story aspect that made me appreciate the book this much (okay maybe a little bit… yes it was a majorly important part, damn) but mainly, mainly mainlyyyyy, most importantly it was their shared outlook and perceptions on the world that they lived in or perhaps still do. They truly spoke to my soul, my heart and always occupied mind; the way they spoke about being alive as well as dying. Why? Because they spoke my language and I so badly wanted to join in their casual and harmless debates that make our lives worth living for. The little things, eh… Their innocence made my heart reach out to them and although not every reader will empathise with them in terms of the whole cruel cancer thing, each reader I’m sure, has felt like a grenade at some point in their life. Or at least their own version of a grenade, pointlessly fleeing back and fourth, trying to find a place that their heart will accept as home…
‘What we want is to be noticed by the universe, to have the universe give a shit what happens to us – not the collective idea of sentient life but each of us, as individuals.’
Gus and Hazel have my soul and I feel a part of their universe as my mind found its home in that ‘invisible and tenuous third space.
Overall score: 19.89/20.67
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